Silence
by MaybeTomorrowI'llFly
Summary: Some wounds never heal. Some of us can't handle the burdens we face. Some of these burdens drive us to silence.
1. Chapter 1

_Hi everyone! It took me forever to think of something good to write and I finally thought of something! I really, really hope you like this, there were many nights that I was sitting up until 2 am thinking about how to make this story the best it can be! Read and review! Thank you all!_

_By the way, I don't own the Sorcerer's Apprentice, sad but oh so true….._

"Alright, today I'm going to show you a very helpful spell. Now clear your head and think of a good memory." Balthazar instructed his apprentice.

"Um, okay. Why am I doing this?" Dave asked with his eyes full of suspicion. When Balthazar was teaching him a "helpful spell" something either caught on fire or was transported across the world.

"Just do it!" Balthazar snapped.

Dave closed his eyes and pictured himself in his lab with Becky. Electricity traveled between the Tesla coils while Dave and Becky watched from the small metal cage. Well, they watched at first- before Dave knew what was happening their lips touched and they found themselves in a passionate kiss. Suddenly, Dave was violently pulled from the pleasant thought. Balthazar was standing in his lab with an amused expression on his face.

"What's with the look? Oh, God- don't answer that. I'm assuming that you used some kind of spell to see what I was thinking about." And with that the apprentice turned a very bright red.

"Precisely" Balthazar answered with a smirk.

"Can I try the spell?" Dave asked eagerly. He was curious about Balthazar's past.

"No." Balthazar said sternly.

"Why not? I'm the Prime Merlinain."

"Even the Prime Merlinain needs practice."

"How can I practice if you won't let me try?"

Balthazar glared at Dave, "Fine. If you want to try it, go right ahead. But if you screw it up don't come crying to me." Balthazar said with a sigh.

"Really? This isn't some kind of trick is it?"

"Its not a trick, Dave." Balthazar said wearily.

"Okay, here I go then." Dave said hesitantly. He closed his eyes and focused on thinking about Balthazar. If this worked, he would see some of Balthazar's deepest memories. _Clear your head, Dave _he said to himself. Before he knew what was happening, Dave felt the same feeling when he was being pulled out of his memory. There was a violent pull and Dave staggered backwards.

Then everything went black.

Balthazar knew his apprentice did it again. Dave screwed up a spell that he needed to practice. But no, he just had to try it and see what would go utterly wrong. Balthazar thought about all the things that could have gone wrong and came to one conclusion. Dave had obviously over focused on trying on spell and the whole thing backfired. If he was right, Balthazar was currently in one of Dave's memories and Dave was probably passed out on his lab floor right now. He looked around to find himself in an empty classroom-wait was that Dave in the corner? Why was he all alone? Where were his classmates?

Why did his apprentice screw everyhting up? Why?

_I hope you enjoyed the first chapter and I hope you want a lot more! Chapter 2 will explain everything- i know its confusing... sorry! please review! _

_thank you,_

_not like the others_


	2. Chapter 2

Balthazar looked around the small classroom to find that he was surrounded by extremely colorful posters. There were a series of desks in clusters of four; each desk had a name tag that had the names of students written on them. The sorcerer surveyed the room again and saw Dave again. He looked about eleven or twelve; nothing seemed out of the ordinary except Dave was the only child in the classroom. Where were all the other children? Balthazar read the schedule on the whiteboard; all the other students were most likely at recess. He walked over to the window and looked down, there was a large playscape swarming with kids all about Dave's age. A bell rang and all the children began to run to the building. Twelve year old Dave let out a little sigh. He nervously ran his fingers through his hair and intently watched the classroom door. Voices suddenly filled the silent hallway and Dave stiffened. Children began filing in the room; each one stopped and briefly stared at Dave. One boy gave Dave a sympathetic look before hurrying to his desk on the other side of the room. What was going on here? All the cheerful post-recess voices were lowered to a whisper and then nothing at all. Balthazar could literally feel the tension the air. The noise of slow, steady footsteps filled the hallway, growing closer and closer. Finally, a short, brown haired boy came into view. Some children gave a little nod to the boy; one began a conversation about last night's football game.  
"I got another detention." The boy said proudly. The class erupted in laughter and the tension evaporated in the room. But there was one student who remained silent.

He remained seated and took out a think book. His eyes moved over every word, Dave was almost completely mesmerized by its contents. Until the brown haired boy pulled it from Dave's grasp.

"Come on, Dylan. Give it back!" Dave said, his voice shaking in fear.

"You're such a loser. All this freak does is stare out of the window and read." Dylan hissed.

A group of kids surrounded Dave's desk as they intently waited for the bully to continue. Dylan shoved the book into his own desk.

"Give it back." Dave moaned.

"Why should I, freak?"

"Remember when Dave had that meltdown last year, Dylan? It was so funny!" A boy wearing baggy jeans and a skull t-shirt asked.

"I didn't have a meltdown! Balthazar said I was a very important force for good." Dave said quietly.

Balthazar was stunned. This was more serious than he thought. When Dave was complaining about people referring their meltdowns as a "Dave Stutler", Balthazar thought it was normal. What kid isn't bullied? Maybe, just maybe, he had been wrong.

"The only thing you're good for is doing my homework. Do you even have a life, freak?"

"I do have a life and I do have friends! Just leave me alone!" Dave screamed his eyes downcast. He was visibly upset. Balthazar had never seen face that was as sad and helpless as this one.

"Who? Name five people who would want to be friends with you." Dylan jeered.

"Patrick, Alan-"

"Alan isn't your friend! Wow, Patrick. He's almost a bigger freak than you."

Balthazar followed Dave's gaze and found that it was the boy who gave Dave the sympathetic look. Apparently this was one of Dave's friends. Now that he thought about it, Dave had mentioned Patrick. He recalled Dave saying that he and Patrick were very close friends. He wondered where Patrick was now. He would have to ask Dave.

"It doesn't matter what you think as long I know they're my friends." Dave whispered.

"Whatever, freak."

Balthazar wondered where the teacher was. This was going to get out of hand and Balthazar knew it was one of Dave's darkest memories. No child should have to go through what Dave did.

"Can I have my book?" Dave asked miserably.

"You want this?" Dylan screamed as he took the thick book out of his desk.

"Please." Dave whispered.

Dylan ripped a page out of the book and another and another.

"What are gonna do, freak?"

Dave remained silent. There seemed to be a different look in his eyes. There was no longer a childish glint in his eyes. They were dull and depressed. The eyes of a man with many hardships. Balthazar felt sick. His apprentice had his fair share of bullying. Why wouldn't they stop?

"Okay, class. I'm Mrs. S." a woman in a long black dress said.

"A sub!" The class whispered excitedly.

Dave picked up all the ripped pages and smoothed then all out on desk. He looked pleadingly at the clock. With every second that passed, he was one second closer to leaving. To be far away from all of his fears.

"Just your luck." Dylan whispered as he stalked to his desk.

Dave slumped down in his chair and gingerly placed the ripped pages into his desk.

A girl behind Dave poked him in the back.

"Why are you such a freak?" The girl asked before snickering.

Dave didn't seem surprised at the question. He didn't say a word in his own defense.

"Hey Dave, let me see your science homework. I forget to do mine." Balthazar recognized him as a friend of Dylan's.

"No. It's my homework. You're just too stupid to do your own." Dave angrily said.

Dylan walked over to Dave and hissed, "You don't talk to my friends like that. Hand over the homework, freak show."

Dave gulped and slowly opened his folder. He pulled out a packet, something that must have taken forever for him to complete and just handed it to Dylan. It would take Dylan's friend five minutes to copy all of the answers.

Balthazar glanced at Dave and noticed tears running down his cheeks. Children laughed and screamed insults to Balthazar's future apprentice.

"Where are you, Balthazar? Why did you leave with them? Why can't I defend myself? Why?" Dave whispered.

"I sorry, Dave. You shouldn't have had to faced that." Balthazar whispered in answer. The sorcerer felt a violent pull and found himself in Dave's lab. His apprentice was still knocked out on the floor as Balthazar walked toward him.

Why was he so harsh on Dave? Hadn't he been through enough?

_I hope you enjoyed it! This was really hard for me to write as it is very personal. _

_Thank you,_

_Not like the others._


	3. Chapter 3

_Hi everyone! Sorry it took so long to update, I couldn't figure out how to continue. _

Dave groaned as he slowly opened his eyes. Why was he laying on the floor? Why did his head hurt so much? Suddenly Dave remembered the spell he tried and most likely miserably failed. He struggled to stand up and saw Balthazar standing a few feet away. Dave looked down at his feet in shame as he pictured Balthazar's disappointed expression. He felt Balthazar's gaze rest upon him.

"I'm not mad, Dave." Balthazar said surprisingly gently.

Dave looked up in surprise. He was at a loss for words. Why was Balthazar looking at him in that concerned way? He was pretty sure he did something wrong, why wasn't Balthazar mad?

"Judging by your expression, I'm assuming you're wondering why I'm not lecturing you. Right?"

"Yeah." Dave said distantly. His head was still throbbing.

Balthazar gave Dave a concerned glance. "I know you're wondering what happened with the spell. You over focused on the spell and I was thrown into one of your memories."

"Not the one when Becky and I-"

"No, Dave it wasn't with Becky." Balthazar said with an amused expression on his face.

Dave gave a relived sigh. "Then which one was it?"

"Well, it was you in your sixth or seventh grade class, there was this kid named Dean who-"

"It was sixth grade and his name was Dylan." Dave said quietly. He automatically looked down at the floor; his eyes had that same helpless look that Balthazar saw in eleven year old Dave.

"You okay?" Balthazar asked. He tried to hide the concern in his voice, but Dave could tell his master was worried.

"I'm fine, Balthazar. Just a little tired." Dave said wearily.

"Maybe you should go home and get some rest, Dave."

"No, I'm fine. I just want to practice. Can I try the new spell again?" Dave asked.

"Dave, go home and rest. You're dead on your feet." Balthazar said his voice with growing concern.

"Well, I guess. I should study for my midterms and-"

"Dave, sit down." Balthazar gestured to a table and chairs.

"Didn't you say that I should go home?"

"I changed my mind. Now sit." Balthazar said in his normal gruff voice.

"Whatever."

"You want some tea?"

"I don't really like-"

"It's good for headaches."

"How do you know I have a headache?" Dave asked with surprise.

"I can read minds, remember?"

Dave gave him a small smile. "I guess I'll have some."

Balthazar picked up the tea kettle and poured some of the brown liquid into a small, white tea cup.

"Here. If you drink all of this, it'll help your headache."

"Seriously, how do you know I have a headache?" Dave asked his eyes wide in surprise-still.

"I tried the same spell you did when I was Merlin's apprentice. The same exact thing happened to me, I over focused and ended up passing out." Balthazar explained his face in a faraway expression.

"Which one of your memories did he see?" Dave asked curiously.

"You know, I don't think he ever told me."

"Why wouldn't he tell you?"

"I don't know. There are so many things I wish he told me. Life is too short, don't you think?"

"Yeah. It definitely is." Dave said as he finished the last of his tea.

"Dave, I wanted to ask you something." Balthazar said awkwardly.

"Oh. You want to ask me about my memory don't you?"

"How did you-"

"I was bullied as a little kid. What's there to talk about?" Dave said this as if it were nothing to him.

"Dave, all I'm saying is that if you ever want to talk about it, well, I'm here." This was very out of character for Balthazar. Dave was surprised at his master's sudden kindness.

"There's nothing to talk about." Dave said quickly. This was obviously a touchy subject for him.

Balthazar sighed. He knew that this was hard for his apprentice, but how long could Dave keep the dark memories to himself?

"I was ten when it started. They say it takes up to two years to heal from bullying. But when it happens everyday from fourth grade to senior year, I don't think it's possible to heal." Dave said quietly. He picked up his backpack off the floor and began to walk away. "Oh, thanks for tea." He said over his shoulder and then Dave walked up the stairs and out the door.

Balthazar sighed. He obviously said something wrong. His apprentice practically stormed out on him. In Balthazar's opinion, he failed at being a master. He let his one and only apprentice down. What kind of a master does that?

Dave walked into his empty apartment, Benet forget to turn the TV off-again. But Dave was too tired to care. He stumbled through the kitchen and into his room. Dave sat on the edge of his bed. He felt bad about walking out on Balthazar like that. It wasn't his fault that Dave was bullied- his master was just trying to help. Dave did have to admit that Balthazar was being a little too kind for his liking- but that was still no excuse for him to walk out on his master. Dave stifled a yawn and lied down on his bed, but he found that sleep didn't come for him. For the rest of the night, Dave stared up at the ceiling; his head swimming with thoughts of his childhood.

_I hope you liked it! Please read and review. Oh, and by the way, I know Balthazar might be a little ooc. Let me know if you think he is._

_Thank you,_

_Not like the others_


	4. Chapter 4

_Hi everyone! Sorry it took so long for me to update. Everything was pretty hectic with the holidays. Hope you like this chapter! Please review!_

Balthazar didn't usually walk around New York City at 3:30 in the morning. But he couldn't sleep. Dave probably hated him. That was a good enough reason to be walking around at 3:30 in the morning. Balthazar thought about how helpless Dave looked, his eyes avoided Balthazar's gaze throughout the short conversation the two sorcerers had. Balthazar walked on through the early hours of morning, his heart heavy.

Dave heard Benet come in around 2:00 AM. He tossed and turned, but he just couldn't sleep. Every time he closed his eyes, Dave was back in his sixth grade classroom. He sighed. He felt terrible about just storming out on Balthazar. Dave abruptly got up of bed and grabbed his shoes. He opened the door to his room and silently walked past Benet who was sleeping on the couch.

"Hey, Dave. Where are you going?" Benet asked sleepily.

"For a walk." Dave said simply.

"In your pajamas?"

Dave had almost forgotten he was still wearing his pajamas. "I guess so."

"Whatever." With that, Benet rolled over on the couch and began snoring once again.

Dave closed the door behind him and walked down the stairs into the apartment building lobby. He pushed open the door and walked into the bitter cold. He shivered slightly. It was pretty stupid to go outside in the middle of winter wearing an old t-shirt and pajama bottoms, but Dave didn't really care. He just kept on walking without a real destination in mind. Dave thought about the conversation him and Balthazar had. His master was just trying to help, but Dave just had to storm out on him. After everything Balthazar had done for Dave, he acted like a jerk and walked out on his master. He just wanted to apologize to Balthazar. He stopped. There was a man walking towards him that looked almost exactly like Balthazar. No, it couldn't be him. Why would Balthazar be walking in New York City in the middle of the night? But as the man got closer, Dave realized that it was his master. He walked right up to the apprentice.

"Dave, what are you doing walking around at this hour?" Balthazar asked gruffly.

"Just thinking."

"It's dangerous for the Prime Merlinian to walk around the city for no reason whatsoever."

"I know but I needed fresh air. By the way, it's dangerous for _you_ to be walking around the city."

Balthazar smiled. Dave was always willing to fight with him, even if he knew it was a fight he was going to lose. "I realize that, Dave. But I am a fully capable sorcerer while you are still an apprentice."

"Well, yeah but-"

Balthazar walked right past Dave, ignoring his attempt to argue.

"Where are you going?" Dave yelled as he ran to catch up to his master.

"I don't know. Where are you going?"

"Well, I don't really have a specific place that I want to-"

"So, you don't know either then?" Balthazar interrupted.

"Pretty much."

A gust of wind blew past the two. Dave shivered and tried to stifle a sneeze.

"You're going to catch pneumonia dressed like that." Balthazar commented.

Dave looked down at his plaid pajama pants. "Yeah. I probably will."

"You don't sound too concerned."

"It's curable." Dave said simply.

Balthazar sighed. Dave was worried about the smallest things, but when it came to pneumonia he didn't even care. Another gust of cold wind swept past them and Dave unsuccessfully tried to mask his sneeze.

"Do you care now?" Balthazar asked his shivering apprentice.

Dave nodded and rubbed his arms. "My lab is right down the street. I'm freezing."

Balthazar gave his apprentice an amused expression and followed him to the lab. Neither sorcerer said a word as Dave unlocked the door to his lab and quickly stepped in. He gave a content sigh and walked down the metal stairs. The apprentice immediately began searching his lab for a sweatshirt. After he moved piles of homework and textbooks, Dave eventually found one of his sweatshirts.

"I have to ask. What compelled you to walk around New York City in your pajamas?" Balthazar asked curiously as he walked down the stairs.

"I just couldn't sleep."

"Dave, you're a terrible liar." Balthazar said as he gave his apprentice a concerned glance.

"Well, I felt really bad about just walking out on you like that earlier. I'm so sorry." Dave said, avoiding his master's gaze.

"Sit down." Balthazar motioned to a table where a kettle of tea was waiting.

Dave obeyed.

"There's no need to be sorry." Balthazar said gently.

Dave looked up in surprise. "But, I-"

"No need to be sorry. I crossed a line. You obviously didn't want to talk about it and I pushed you. I'm the one who should be sorry- and don't argue with me."

Dave was silent. He never heard Balthazar apologize before.

"If you do want to talk about it then, well, I'm here." Balthazar said awkwardly.

"Do you mean that?"

"If I didn't mean it, then I wouldn't offer." The older sorcerer growled.

Dave looked down at the table for a moment. He thought about all the insults and all the times he was beaten up. Should he tell Balthazar or keep it to himself? He never told a soul before.

"Well, what exactly did you see in my memory?" Dave asked, he lifted his head from the table.

"You were in a classroom all alone while all the other kids were at recess. The kids came in and one boy named Dylan ripped up one of your books." Balthazar said with concern in his voice.

Dave's face had a faraway expression. "Oh, I remember that. Didn't I start crying?"

"Yes." Balthazar glanced at Dave. He had dark circles under his eyes and looked about ready to fall asleep. "Maybe we should call it a night. I'm getting pretty tired."

"Okay. I'm just going to sleep here tonight. I don't really feel like walking home." Dave looked relieved that he didn't have to talk about his painful childhood memories. With that, he walked over to the small couch that he left in the corner and instantly fell asleep.

Balthazar picked up his Incantas and began reading as the sun rose in the distance. Dave was obviously bothered by what happened to him but he just wouldn't talk about it.

_Thank you for reading! Please review and I hope that I'll finish chapter 5 _in the next few days!

_Thank you all,_

_Not like the others _


	5. Chapter 5

_Hi everyone! Sorry it took so long for me to update, but I wasn't sure what I should next. I hope you enjoy! PLEASE REVIEW!_

Balthazar was quietly reading the spell on invisibility in his Incantas when there was a knock on the lab door. He quietly walked past his sleeping apprentice and hurried up the stairs. He opened the door to find Becky, her golden hair was tucked behind her ears and she was wearing simple jeans and a winter coat.

"Hello, Becky." Balthazar said with a smile.

"Oh, hi Balthazar. Is Dave here? I really need help with my homework."

"Dave is here but he's sleeping."

"Sleeping? Is he okay?" Becky said with worry.

"He's fine, physically. But I don't know about mentally." Balthazar's face remained expressionless, but Becky thought she saw a glint of worry in the sorcerer's eyes.

"What do mean?" There was growing concern in her voice.

"Well, Dave was trying a new spell yesterday and I was accidentally brought into one of his memories. It was in his sixth grade classroom and he was, uh, being bullied." Balthazar said this all awkwardly.

"Oh, poor Dave." Becky muttered. "He told me about it once, but not in detail or anything. It really hurt him, Balthazar."

Balthazar sighed. Why didn't his apprentice ever mention this to him?

"Wait, who was bullying him? Do you remember anyone's name?"

"Dylan, I think. But the whole class ended up joining in."

"Dylan was in our fourth grade class and he was pretty mean then. But after that whole thing at Arcana Cabana, he was especially mean to Dave."

Balthazar shook his head. Dave really needed to talk to about this.

"Can I come in? I want to talk to Dave when he wakes up."

"Of course."

The two walked down the stairs and took a seat at the table where Balthazar and Dave had tea the night before. Becky studied her boyfriend. He was wearing plaid pajama pants and a red sweatshirt. Dave looked so peaceful; it was hard to imagine how much pain he was dealing with. The apprentice moaned slightly in his sleep and rolled over on the couch.

"Did Dave ever mention any of this with you?" Becky asked.

"No. He never did tell me." Balthazar said thoughtfully

"Balthazar, I didn't mean to-" Becky said uncomfortably.

"No, no. It's alright." Balthazar said distantly.

"You know, Dave trusts you with his life and I'm sure he'll trust you with what happened to him when the time comes." Becky said sincerely.

Balthazar thought about this for a second. Dave had been through so much and it was a struggle for him to even talk about it.

Dave let out a content sigh and opened his eyes slowly. "What time is it?" Dave mumbled as he rolled over.

"12:30." Balthazar said in his usual gruff voice.

Dave slowly got off of the couch and faced the small table. "Becky! What are you doing here?" Dave asked pleasantly.

"I just wanted to see you. I haven't seen you in a couple days and I really missed you." Becky gave her boyfriend a warm smile and took his hand in hers. Dave wrapped his arms around her and kissed her cheek.

"I missed you." He whispered.

"I missed you more."

The young couple stood there for a few more seconds, looking into each other's eyes.

"How are you, Dave?" Becky asked with concern.

"I've been better. You know…" Dave trailed off.

Becky sighed and wrapped her arms around Dave. "There's nothing to be ashamed of." She whispered.

"I know. But I just…" Dave couldn't continue.

Becky gave her boyfriend another worried look. She leaned over and kissed her boyfriend gently on the lips. "I will always love you for who you are, Dave. Remember that." Her eyes were full of emotion. There was so much that could have been said but no one said a word.

Finally Dave broke the silence. "Balthazar, I need to tell you something."

Balthazar looked up at his apprentice in surprise. He didn't think it would be that easy to get Dave to talk about this. He really wasn't sure how to respond but luckily Becky broke yet another awkward silence.

"Dave, I'm so sorry but I have class in 20 minutes." She kissed his cheek lightly and whispered, "I will always love you for who you are. Remember that." This was inaudible to Balthazar. With that, she walked up the stairs and out of the door.

Balthazar looked at his apprentice. He was sitting upright on the couch, looking down at the floor.

"So, what's on your mind?" The master said gently.

"I've been kind of, umm, well…" Dave trailed off.

"Dave, relax. If you don't want to talk about it, then it's okay." Balthazar had a concerned expression on his face.

"No. I want to talk about it. I guess it started in the fourth grade after the whole thing at Arcana Cabana." He looked up slightly.

Balthazar tried to remember the details of that day but couldn't.

Dave seemed to read his master's mind. "Everyone thought I was crazy. I came out of the store almost in tears screaming about a fire that two guys who got sucked in an urn caused. After that day I was an outsider. No one wanted to be around me and when they were, it was just to insult me. It was all my fault. I trapped you in an urn for ten year, so I guess I deserved it." Dave avoided his master's gaze.

"No. It was not your fault. You can't blame yourself for something that happened ten years ago. You were untrained, young, and had no idea magic even existed. No one deserves to be bullied, Dave. Remember that." Balthazar said firmly.

Dave didn't respond. He tried to choke back tears, but it was unsuccessful. He began to shake uncontrollably.

Balthazar looked at his apprentice in worry. Should he comfort his sobbing apprentice or let him be? He decided to comfort Dave. The master walked over to the couch and sat down next to his apprentice. Balthazar awkwardly put his hand on Dave's shoulder comfortingly. He was afraid that Dave would pull away, but he moved closer to his master. Neither sorcerer said a word. They sat on the couch for what seemed like forever in silence. Dave looked up and into his master's eyes.

"Thank you, Balthazar. For everything." Dave said sincerely.

Balthazar looked into his apprentice's eyes. "You would do the same."

At that moment, Dave's eternal silence was broken. The burdens he faced were lifted off his shoulders and the wounds had healed. It was time to let go.

The End

_PLEASE READ THIS! I wanted to leave a sort of Author's Note. _

_I don't really know what to say, but here I go. Stop bullying-right now! I know, everyone has heard this before… but it's important. Treat people the way you want to be treated, be kind others. That's basically it. I hope you liked my story!_

_Thank you all so much, _

_Not like the others _

_Please review!_


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